


Things you said after it was over

by DaydreamDestiel



Series: Prompted Fics [10]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-07-24 15:10:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7512974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaydreamDestiel/pseuds/DaydreamDestiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt from anon: Things you said after it was over, Sabriel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Sam, I’m sorry.” Gabe told him brokenly. 

Gabe’s eyes were sadder than Sam had ever seen them, shiny with unshed tears that stabbed straight through Sam’s already bloodied heart. Sam swallowed hard, choked back his own tears and nodded his understanding. 

All Sam really wanted to do was reach out and wrap Gabe in his arms. Rewind the last twenty-four hours and live them over and over again; Just to be with Gabe, see him smile and laugh and feel the slide of their naked skin against one another. 

He’d give, say, do anything to have it all back. But there was no coming back from this. There was no more time, and they’d both known it was coming, and _fuck,_ it just _hurt._ Like nothing would ever be right again without Gabe’s jokes and sarcasm and over the top innuendo to help him get through his day. 

“You know I wish I could stay, kid.” Gabe tried again as he leaned back against the crappy four door car his parent’s had given him for graduation. 

The car was loaded down with everything Gabe was taking with him, boxes littered the back seat. Sam looked everywhere but at Gabe. He didn’t want Gabe to see how wrecked he felt, how hollow he was. 

“I know, Gabe.” Sam told him and he was almost proud of how normal his voice came out. 

“Sam, look at me.” Gabe demanded gently, and Sam did; he’d never been able to say no to Gabe. 

For a moment Gabe just looked into his eyes, like he was trying to read every ounce of hidden emotion there; like he was peeling back all of Sam’s defensive layers. 

Finally, when Gabe saw whatever it was he’d been looking for, he closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around Sam, tugged him close and pressed his lips to Sam’s in a warm kiss that was filled with everything they weren’t saying. 

_Don’t leave me, I need you, please don’t go,_ Sam’s begged. 

_I have to, I’m sorry, I love you, don’t hate me_ , Gabe’s answered. 

And then Gabe pulled back, his hand cupped Sam’s cheek, his thumb brushed over his cheekbone. Sam sucked in a breath; he felt like all the oxygen had just been punched out of him because that one little motion, Gabe’s hand on his cheek? That was Gabe saying goodbye. 

“Gabe…” Sam started, he cut himself off, swallowed the tears that threatened to spill. 

“I’ll see you around Sam.” Gabe whispered; he sounded every bit as wrecked as Sam felt and it didn’t feel like see you around, it felt like see you never. 

Sam’s heart was ripping or tearing or something awful and bloody and how was he supposed to say goodbye to the only person he’d ever loved? It wasn’t fair! How was he supposed to go back to just Sam? They’d been Sam and Gabe for what felt like forever. Sam didn’t even know who he was anymore without Gabe. 

“Yeah.” Sam mumbled, and the way Gabe flinched at the cold tone in Sam’s voice just made everything so much worse. 

Gabe dropped his hand, and walked away, and Sam didn’t really understand how his body was still standing. All he wanted to do was curl up in a ball and sleep until everything stopped hurting. Which, at that moment, felt like would be never. 

One last time, Gabe glanced over the car at Sam, like he was drinking in every detail of him, saving it somewhere in his brain to replay over and over, at least that’s what Sam was doing to Gabe. 

Then Gabe nodded to him and slid into his car. Didn’t look back as he pulled away and Sam’s heart finally broke. It was over and Gabe was gone. 

“I love you.” 

Sam wasn’t even sure if he said it out loud. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt was Sabriel: Things you said with too many miles between us, so I decided to make it a follow up to this one. :D

Sam stared blankly at the phone in his hand, a heavy pit of sadness settled in his stomach and the stabbing pain in his chest that had dulled to a steady ache flared ice-cold and painful again. Strains of Ed Sheeran’s Thinking Out Loud echoed loudly in the silence of his room while Gabe’s name lit up the screen beneath the dorky photo they’d taken at the beach during the summer. They hadn’t talked since Gabe had left just before school started. Hadn’t had a reason to. 

Even if Sam had thought about calling every day for two months he hadn’t. Pathetically, he’d held out hope that Gabe would change his mind. Realize how much he missed him and beg to come back. Beg for Sam to forgive him. And without a single doubt Sam would’ve. 

Knew, or thought he did anyway, that Gabe had only broken up with him because he didn’t want Sam spending his last year of high school sitting around hoping his college boyfriend would be home on holidays. Especially if he might not be able to make it home. 

Only now he was sitting at home anyway, missing him just the same. Hurt because he’d watched his best friend and boyfriend all rolled up in one drive away without any plans to come back. 

And now his phone was ringing and how could Sam have forgotten that Gabe had set that stupid song as his ringtone? 

Last second Sam accepted the call and pressed the phone to his ear, “Hi.” 

It didn’t seem like enough, but it was all he could manage. Just a wounded little hi, and there went his chance to sound unaffected. 

_ “Sam?” _

“Yeah.” 

_ “I…”   _ A short paused filled with static and then,  _ “I just needed to talk to you.”  _

“Two months of nothing and that’s all you’ve got?” 

_ “I know. I’m sorry.”  _

“You’re sorry? For which part? Leaving or staying gone? Oh, wait, lemme guess, you’re sorry you called. Because that’d be just great. Nothing for two months and then you’re sorry you called. What d’you want, Gabe?” 

Sam could practically hear Gabe wince at the acid in his voice and his heart cracked a little. For how many times he’d imagined this conversation he’d never thought it would go like this. But he couldn’t help it, every bitter, sad, lost feeling he’d had for the last two months bubbled under his skin, made his body feel too small to contain it all. 

_ “Sam… I just- I miss you.”  _

“And?” 

Fuck, Gabe was gonna hang up and Sam wouldn’t blame him. Why couldn’t he just say he missed Gabe too? Tell him he still loved him, wanted him, needed him. 

_ “And I needed to know if you’re okay. You don’t think I wanted to call you every day? That I didn’t regret leaving things like I did every second? Space, Sam, I was giving you some.”  _

Sam scoffed, “Yeah? And like I said before you left, it’s not up to you to decide what I want.” 

_ “I know.”  _

Awkward silence. Neither of them knew where to go from there, Sam guessed. 

“Are you coming home for Christmas?” 

God, Sam hated himself for asking. Hated how pleading his voice sounded. Hated it even more that his heart was in his throat while he waited for Gabe’s answer. 

_ “I didn’t know if you’d want me there.” _

“Well, I do.” Sam admitted. 

_ “Do you… Sam, you gotta know it wasn’t because I don’t love you. I still love you. I’ll probably never stop loving you. You just- you deserve better, kid.”  _

Sam’s eyes stung with hot tears, too many goddamn miles between them and all he wanted was Gabe’s arms around him. Months of wondering and doubting himself and barely making it through everyday without breaking down and all it took was a couple of sentences for everything to come crashing down around him again. 

“No. Fuck that. Fuck all of it. I still love you too, you fucking asshole. Don’t tell me I deserve better. I don’t want better. I just want  _ you.” _

_ “Sam-”  _

“Come home for Christmas, Gabe.”

_ “Yeah, yeah, okay.”  _  Gabe let out a relieved sounding sigh. 

“And fucking call me more.” Sam ordered. “Plus you better think of something goddamn epic for my Christmas present.” 

Gabe laughed, and Sam smiled even though his cheeks were wet. 

“And you know what?” 

_ “What?” _

“I think I deserve a blowjob for every fucking week you didn’t call. And I think you better pay up over Christmas break.” Sam said with a smirk. 

_ “Can that be your Christmas present?” _

“No, dick. I want you to agonize over what to get me for the next two months.” 

_ “I don’t remember you being this cruel.”  _

“Yeah, well, guess it turns out I’m vindictive?” 

_ “Sam?”  _

“Yeah?”

“ _ Love you.” _

Sam huffed a loud sigh, “Love you too.”


End file.
